Parent: Ya’ll are going to be empty nesters soon. How are you going to feel when they go off to school and they are not home? What are ya’ll going to do?
Me: I’m glad they are going off to college. It’s time for them to get from under Mom and Dad. I’ll miss them. I’ll be sad, but I am truly tired. I’m excited for my kids. My husband and I will slowly transition to what it was like before the kids.
Parent: You are going to be sad. They are going to be so far away. You are going to miss your kids. What will you do? I don’t know what I would do.
As my husband and I move into a new phase of our lives people we know keep asking us the same question over and over. The same statement and question are getting on my nerves and driving me crazy. Ya’ll are going to be empty nesters. What are y’all going to do? Their response to my answer is what is so frustrating. First, I wonder if they are truly listening. Second, I think why are you asking the question as if life stopped when I became a parent. Third I’m thinking it’s okay if I’m ready for my kids to be out of the house. They’ve grown as much as they can grow at home and it’s time for them to experience life on their own. Last, I was alive before giving birth to my kids and I’m alive now. I traveled to several countries, lived in different states, traveled to different parts of the United States. While with kids I spent time writing poems, songs, books, short stories and there is so much more I want to do. But first I really just want to rest. I want to truly do nothing for a few days and sit in silence or just observe. Guiding your own children is hard. Especially today. There almost always needs to be a stay at home parent to make sure the kids have an advocate when they can’t advocate for themselves. I shouldn’t even have explained that part but hopefully you get the gist.
I know that somethings I really should not put energy into what people say because many don’t know me or are not genuinely interested in learning anything about me, but dang. The constant asking of the question and the same responses annoy me. I quickly forget that I have to let people think they know. I have to let people feel what they are going to feel. I have to let people deal with their own reactions because their response speaks to how they would deal with the situation.
Really no one knows the future. I just know it’s time for the kids to leave the nest. It’s time for me to be more of me again.
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